Dealing with the Friendship Stress of Middle School

by Lyn Newton | More from this Blogger

13 Oct 2007 03:12 PM

To a young teen, school is life. And frankly life (school) is not always pleasant. Children can be very cruel about what they say and do. It can be also be very hard for a child to understand why they are being labeled as an outcast among their once crowd of friends. It can be even harder for the parents to deal with the child's stress and sadness.

In middle school, girls are likely to make groups and change groups often. They hold grudges and try to build themselves up by putting others down. While it is a normal part of trying to develop their identity, it can be very troublesome and uneasy for parents and teachers to deal with.

I can remember the days as an eighth teacher when I would spend hours trying to listen and straighten out conflicts among the young teen girls. While the boys have their troubles, they often do not hold grudges or cause a stir near as much as the girls.

When your students or your own children are going through the trials and tribulations of a young teen girl's life, there are some things that you can do to lessen the stress that she is feeling.

Discuss with the child that the acts are not personal. They are part of growing up. Feeling sorry for her or her feeling sorry for herself will not make things better. In fact it often makes things worse because the other students realize how they are "getting to her".

Teach the child to remain true to herself. Some children change to be part of a group or in crowd. While this may give them a moment in the spotlight, it can never last very long. Being true to who you are and what you believe in will always prevail in the end.

Finally, do not blow it off. While you should not cause a lot of drama, you should also make her understand that you care. You are not treating her like a baby. Remember to the child, this is life. This is what is important.

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Learn more about Lyn Newton

Lyn is a kindergarten teacher and mommy to a girl and a boy. In her spare time, she enjoys informative and creative writing.

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